Perfect Day

Today I decided that D. and I would go to the beach for his first time.  Part of me felt guilty since I would be the only one witnessing his first beach experience but then I thought longer about it.  It's just that V. doesn't seem to get the significance which ends up annoying me and takes away from my joy.  And I., well she would just be annoyed that I couldn't spend most of the time playing with her and it might end up turning into a disappointing outing complete with a tantrum.  I just really wanted to be in the moment and enjoy it thoroughly and to be honest, D. deserves to have some "firsts" with his momma just like I. has enjoyed all these years.

And enjoy it we did.  D. liked the sand and had no hesitation with it.  I wasn't sure how he'd react because he isn't comfortable with grass and I. never really liked the sand.  She still hates to get things on her hands; if anything she's gotten more fussy about it.  But D. dug right in and loved putting the rocks in and out of his bucket.  That didn't compare to how much he loved the ocean.  As soon as we walked on the beach, he noticed the water and waves.  I thought perhaps the coldness of the water might give him pause but not at all.    I was trying to take it slow with him, holding him up to get only his toes wet but he made it quite clear that he wanted more.  He immediately went to all fours and began crawling towards the horizon with no fear.  Even when the wave would come in, it would invigorate him more and make him crawl faster.  It was insane!  One look at his face and I could see he was in heaven.  The great thing was that even though he was in love with the water, he loved the sand too and was happy to play in it for awhile.  I just loved watching him, the expressions on his face and especially the way he would look up at me and smile.

I love my boy, my 11 month old boy as of today.  I found it ironic that I used to have night terrors often but since D. has been born and sleeping in the same room, I've had maybe two.  Two in 11 months is amazing.  However, last night the first night he slept in his own room, I had a really bad night terror that I woke up twice from, fell back to sleep and went right back into.  Then I had another stressful dream after that.  All of the dreams had one thing in common - they revolved around and were about D.  Hopefully now that V. is back and will now be sleeping in the bed with me, the dreams will subside.