I had one of my worst vivid dreams this morning. I'm not kidding. It was so bad that when I was telling V. about it tonight at dinner (yes, he actually was here for dinner), I started sobbing and this was over 12 hours later. This was the nightmare.
We were at home and I was standing on top of our roof (come on, it was a dream). Just below our roof but still 3 stories up was a flat patio area full of people including V. I. came running out on the patio, saw me, called out "Momma", and then started running towards me. There was no walls around this patio and she ran right off the edge because she was staring right at me. V. tried to grab her with one arm, then with the other, and as I screamed, I watched her fall down 3 stories and land flat on her back on a wooden deck. It was a horrifying sight and was so vivid that it makes me cry even now as I write it.
I ran down to where she was and cradled her in my arms. Her legs and arms were twitching and only one of her eyes was open. I was telling her how much I loved her. Running through my mind was that there may be hope because she landed on the wood deck rather than the pavement and then her other eye opened up. However, I knew that she probably had internal injuries and needed medical help now so I was screaming for 911. This is when I woke up, screaming.
I don't even know how to end this post. Maybe with the fact that we had a fun packed day today. I. had sports class this morning, then off to the chiropractor to put me back together again, then a lunch picnic in the car and a frozen yogurt treat before we headed off to a pumpkin patch fair to meet my mom for the afternoon. I was thankful to be able to spend time with I. today after such a horrible dream but it still doesn't erase my emotions and memories. I wonder if there is some way to manipulate the memory of a dream to just be a dream and take the feeling of reality out of it?
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