I may only have been a friend to Mark according to his territorial, narcissistic wife but I was closer to him than many spouses are - without sex and arguments. I saw this quote and it struck me as true:
"For one moment, our lives met, our souls touched." Oscar Wilde
Our one moment lasted for 11 years. No, I never could have been his wife - we both knew that and I still know that now. Marriage-wise we were incompatible but as far as two souls in sync with each other, we knew instinctively exactly what the other needed when they needed it. Whether it was encouragement, humor, a stiff drink, a serious talk, or just silence somehow we knew what was needed. We didn't think about it beforehand, we just trusted that our instincts would be right and they were. Many times after Mark was diagnosed and there were difficult things to talk about I would stress about it beforehand. But then I'd remember that somehow I would always say the right thing at the right time and that it would be okay. I'm not sure if it was instinctual or a small help from God, but regardless it always seemed to come happen.
I finally told him that I loved him in the last year he was alive and he said he loved me too. That's good enough for me.
2 comments:
Such a touching post to capture what your friendship with Mark was all about.
It's good to have friends like Mark.
And I'm so sorry you lost him.
You described your friendship beautifully.
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