Yucky Conversation

A brief intermission in my "Days of Summer" postings.  I've been busy editing the over 200 pictures I had on my camera from the past month/month and a half.  It's so time consuming but also is nice because it brings back all the good memories and great pictures of our fun times.  But it has derailed me from my summer postings.  Planning on doing a catch up shortly.

Today has been an anxiety inducing day and now I'm not looking forward to a conversation with V. when he calls tonight.  The lesser of the stresses (kind of) is that my dad has been suffering from polycythemia which is too many red blood cells for about 5 weeks now.  That may not sound like a problem but it is, can lead to strokes, blood clots, heart and lung damage etc.  They've just been kind of burying their heads like always figuring it would get better so no real rush.  Then this morning, he gets out of the shower and looks at his ankles and all his blood vessels had broken down there so there is blood all under the skin.  So he goes for another blood test and it's even worse!  They said he needs to have 4 pints of blood removed (not all at once) in order to get the numbers to where they should be.  I got so mad and I think it finally made them take some action because hopefully he will be able to get in tomorrow and give some of that blood.

The more dire situation has to do with V.'s dad.  On Tuesday night I sent him some pictures of V. from this summer because when we were at their house, I showed him some pictures on my camera and he specifically wanted one of V.  Wednesday morning, I got an email from his mom thanking me and saying that today was the last day of the second round of radiation and that he would be starting chemo in a few days.  This was different than what V.'s brother had told us so last night when I saw his brother on FB, I checked in with him and asked about it.  Turns out that the cancer is back in his skull which is dismaying because that was really quick.  They can't do radiation to his skull for another year so chemo is the last ditch resort to trying to remove it/slow it down.  His brother was asking when V. was home because he needed to ask him a question either tonight or tomorrow.  I told him that I needed to be able to tell V. what is going on first so I'm going to have to tell him tonight over the phone and his brother is going to call him tomorrow night.  I really was hoping to wait until V. was home and tell him in person but I'm not going to interfere with his brother needing to call him either.  I guess it can't be helped but still not looking forward to it at all.

I sent his dad an e-card, kind of a funny one but more like a tongue in cheek and told him that we were praying for his strength, healing and physical comfort and signed it as his favorite daughter in law which is our joke because I am his ONLY daughter in law and he calls himself my favorite father in law.  I got an email back from him today that said,

This is let you know that your card did put a smile on my face and filled my heart with so much Love for your thoughtfulness and words. I also want to tell that the pictures you sent were great and I love them. Please give everyone there a big hug and a kiss for me. Remind my son how lucky he is to have such a great woman by his side, you are one of a kind as far as I'm concerned.

All my Love

Vic

 Brought tears to my eyes and also pain to my heart.  I asked I. to make him something today and she did so in such a big way that I had to use a manila envelope to fit it all in.  I'm feeling that heightened sense of anxiety where I just get a feel like something bad is about to happen.  I can be driving and it just comes out of nowhere and then I realize it's because of his dad and that it's bringing up what happened with Mark and it scares me because I know how fast it can happen.  One afternoon you can be hanging out and a few hours later, the death spiral begins.  On top of this, I just don't know how to help V..  This after 10 years of marriage.  But honestly, V. has no clue how to help himself let alone know how I can help him.  I'm just going to have to pray hard for insight, intuition, and patience and let God lead me in the right direction.  Kind of like the same thing I need to do about this house sale, come to think of it.