Observation

Today we're going to the Zoo with my parents taking advantage of my father being laid off (again). The weather should be just perfect and it'll give me 2 other people to divide I.'s focused attention and large number of words between. So that's all good. The only thing is that both my parents talk at least as much as I. does so usually by the end of the day, my brain needs silence. The strategy is to keep the 3 of them talking to one another as much as possible and I can mostly sit back and watch.

An interesting observation came up in therapy yesterday regarding being able to depend on others. She pointed out that it isn't so much that I don't have anyone, it's just that the few people that I do have are kind of hit and miss in the dependability arena. Like my mom for instance. When she says she'll come over at noon, it means 1:30 and presently I. eats dinner at 3pm (until Sunday when we change the clocks) so that means the "break" I thought I may get or the things I was going to get done don't because there's not enough time. V. and his demanding job obviously make it hard to depend on him for anything that falls between Monday and Friday. Anyways, I've just got to figure it out for when this baby comes and I. is home all day for those first 4 weeks or so. I certainly don't want to "farm her out" because that is our last month before she goes to school full-time but I am also smart enough to know that we can't all be in this house all day every day or one or both of us will go crazy.

I'm sure I'll figure it out but it would probably be smarter to form some sort of plan before those first few weeks of a new baby - the rigorous breastfeeding schedule, the lack of sleep, and the recovery from birth (which hopefully will be a VBAC). A good plan can help avoid nervous breakdowns.