It's been awhile (AGAIN) that I wrote a post but it seemed like after the fires, this whole house was in a funk. We seemed to be misstepping throughout the day and it was like running uphill backwards all day long. Exhausting! Then we had Isabella's birthday (which she enjoyed immensely) and survived my sister's drama on the same day. Maybe I'll give an abbreviated version of that day in a minute. But for now, I'll continue the timeline. We also changed the clocks that weekend which added another misstep and then Isabella spent 2 whole nights at my parents' house while I got 2 rooms painted and the carpet and tile cleaned. Which brings me to the title of the post. Here I had 2 days free of Isabella (though I had to stay home with workers "chasing" me around) but still...I was babyless. Yes, I enjoyed it immensely but I actually felt like I was floundering a bit without my normal routine. I read, watched morning tv, played some brain games on the computer, did some tutorials for new software, etc. and still I just felt a little off. It was so nice to not have to talk and just be silent but it just felt weird. I couldn't believe how much energy I still had by the end of the day! But, you know, it didn't seem like there was a point or accomplishment for the day and that's because Isabella wasn't here. I didn't feel like that before I had her so it was quite a surprise to me. I was reading a book while on the treadmill today and read this perfect quote in a not so perfect book but when I read it, I thought "Yep, that's right." So here's the quote:
"Is the ability to miss your baby so viscerally, even when you're supposed to be enjoying a night off, just another of nature's tricks to make mothers stay at home? It seems to me that if you're not within touching distance of your baby, she worms her way into your head like a catchy pop song, pokes her little fat fingers into your brain, pulls at your heart, reminds you that child-free freedom is not what you hunger for after all." (The Yummy Mummy, Polly Williams)
So now for the abbreviated version of Isabella's 2nd birthday day:
Noon: Discover my pet fish is dead. Cry and have Vinny take care of it.
12:30pm: Sister calls freaking out that she can't get to the party at 1:30 'cause my mom didn't call to wake her up (she's 24 freaking yrs. old). Says we're all being buttheads. Tell her I'm tired of the victim role, she's needs to take responsibility and I have to go get Isabella down for a nap. She says she'll just stay home and wish she was dead and that she'll never forgive her. Tell her I'm sorry she feels that way but I'm not going to deal with her drama on my daughter's 2nd birthday.
3:00pm: Brother still not here because sister says he has to wait for her to get to his house so that he can bring her to the party.
3:30pm: Brother calls to say sister has totalled her car (that my parents just bought her a month ago for $8000)into a parked towtruck and has been taken to ER and then jail.
3:35pm: I insist they stay for birthday cake and singing Isabella Happy Birthday and then they leave.
That was the drama free birthday I was hoping for. Can't wait to see what Thanksgiving holds!
